Halloween Madness

Joey is 8 years old, with hyperactive tendencies and speech problems. He speaks quickly and is difficult to understand. Often uncontrollable, reprimands for his behavior were constant and usually inconsistent. Watching the family process was exhausting even if I was not participating in it.

Most recently however, I had a unique experience with Joey. While visiting family, Joey and his mom arrived. This time, Joey was different. He was calmer and his speech was much clearer. He asked if he and I could play the game WII together. I was happy to oblige. We decided to try our hands at bowling.

Joey and I had two great games. We high-five-d one another for a strike or a spare and laughed through our bad throws. All in all, Joey was a joy to bowl with.

And then a funny thing happened. “Mom, can I have a candy? I did not have any dessert at lunch.” His mom consented with little thought, and Joey ran to get his Halloween bag. He pulled out a small chocolate bar and within seconds it was devoured. I watched as he eyed his mother’s awareness and slyly pulled out another. That one quickly disappeared. Nothing was said, so Joey continued to devour one candy after another.

Somewhere between a Twix and a Skiddles, he approached his uncle with a large yellow envelope and asked if he would donate to his school. “Where is my money going?” asked Uncle Bill.

He looked to his mother for an explanation. “Joey’s school is collecting money to help find a cure for childhood diabetes.” I managed to keep my mouth shut as the plot unfolded.

Candy continued to flow as denial and pretense filled the room. Not a word was spoken. It did not take long for Joey’s behavior to deteriorate. He became unruly, his ability to communicate was clearly out the window; Joey was not fun any more. The next words I remember coming from his mother’s lips were, “you need a time out”. What Joey really needed was an understanding of how food affects one’s behavior. One candy was more than enough for Joey’s sensitive little body.

I could not help but wonder if Joey’s behavior and speech might improve dramatically if he was fed a healthy diet filled with fresh organic foods, free of artificial colors, preservatives and caffeine. I thought it sad that Joey and his family may never have the opportunity to find out.

Should I have spoken up? The family is quite aware of my beliefs. I have learned not to jump into another’s space unless asked. Until then, I will continue to remain aware of my own judgements that obviously still need my constant attention.