Don't Drink the Water!

Connor is extremely intelligent; he is also extremely sensitive (as all children are). What causes an extremely intelligent and sensitive child to one day be unable to focus and think clearly?  That was a question my daughter posed to me recently. “Connor took a test at school for next year’s placement, and he was unable to comprehend most of it. This is all stuff he knows. What happened?” I’m happy she asked.

These words were reminiscent of  a time many years ago when her brother had similar issues. Shannon forgot one of my simple rules. When you ask a question, answer it with another question. “What has Connor been drinking?”

It took only a moment before Shannon realized the answer. “He brings his water to school; when he runs out, however, he fills his bottle at the bubbler.” 

“Stop using the bubbler; send enough water for the day from home.”

She was a bit embarrassed that she had forgotten Joshua’s lessons from the past. Yet, I  found it a bit amusing. I knew this was an important lesson as well as a fixable one for both mom and son. “After you take him off the water, remember to give him Dandelion Root every day to help flush his liver.

Toxic water clogs the liver. A clogged liver clogs the brain. Fix the liver; fix the brain. 

A week later, Shan and I were FaceTiming and I could see Connor doing his homework in the background. “How is Connor doing?” I asked.

“Great. No problem at all since we took him off the water at school.”

Sometimes there are simple solutions to complex problems. Each experience is another lesson in learning how to heal together. 

You can learn more about healing a chemically sensitive child by ordering my book below:
Joshua's Lessons - Raising a Healthy Child in a Toxic World

When to Use the Flower Essence Vine - Determination or Domination?

We are told that what we see is what we get, and there is a lot of truth to that when it comes to raising children. Early in life, children show us their strengths and weaknesses; the best and the worst so to speak of who they may become.

Our job as parents is to help guide them to be the best of themselves, ensuring their safety and happiness along the way.  Flower essences are one tool that can help guide our children back to who they came to be. 

Flower essences help balance our personalities, not change them. We are who we are; yet at times we may forget who that is. This can happen at a very young age. Flower essences help us remember. If we become imbalanced in our personalities, we may feel we are on a pendulum, swinging from one side to another, unable to find that middle ground.  Flower essences help us find our center.  

The Vine personality, when out of balance, is strong willed and domineering. They know what they want, when they want it and will move obstacles out of their way to get it. They are demanding and learn to use that energy to control situations. They know how to stamp their feet, refusing to budge until the exhausted parent feels defeated and gives in. They may become the playground bullies later in life. The good news is we can help them change that direction. 

The healthy Vine personality is a powerful leader who uses his leadership qualities to guide others toward their own paths in life. Their success comes from their willingness to listen to the thoughts and ideas of others, being mindful of their feelings. 

Vine can help us learn that the constant need to be right feeds anger and discord.  Vine helps us recognize that individual power comes from a willingness to change our rigid ways to become more flexible, free and cooperative.  A balanced Vine soon learns that getting our way sometimes means allowing others to win.

When a Child May Need Walnut - The Transition Flower Essence

Walnut is a 2nd chakra flower that is used to help create healthy relationships in life with our ‘self’ as well as others.  As adults, when the 2nd chakra is out of balance, hormonal issues can develop. Walnut can be helpful in balancing our hormonal states after childbirth and during pre and post menopausal times.  Walnut helps us move freely through these periods of transition.

Walnut can be extremely useful for many childhood situations when resistance to change is apparent.  One incident comes to mind when a 2 year old child was brought to me because her teeth refused to pop through.  Her mother was extremely concerned.  Within weeks after using walnut, one tooth after another quickly appeared.  

My greater concern in this situation was not the teething problem; it was the parenting problem. The mother was resist to the fact that her baby was ready to become a toddler.  She preferred that her baby remain a baby to satisfy her own needs.  Words are very powerful and the baby’s inability to mature was influenced by her mother’s fears.  A dose of walnut for the mother was apparently needed as well.

Other instances when walnut can be helpful is when a toddler is resistant to potty training.  A few drops a day can help a child easily move through these new experiences.  For parents who have allowed their children to sleep in bed and are having problems breaking these old habits, walnut can help shift them to sleeping on their own.

Walnut can be used in many ways during changes in life that seem too much to handle or when we avoid the need to change... going off to school, moving to a new home, divorce, marriage... there are countless instances that Walnut can help us enjoy changes the way nature intended.

Changes in life, whether we deem them good or bad, are all opportunities to learn and experience more about who we came to be.  Avoiding or resisting change can create stagnation which in turn brings about that feeling we often refer to as “stuck” in life situations.  Walnut helps unbind that energy, allowing a to return to the excitement that every new opportunity affords.

Practicing Letting Go Confidently

A client recently shared a very powerful lesson regarding her family's healing journey.  We have been working together for 8 years; I know that because we started when she was pregnant for her one and only sensitive child.  Reading her story reminded me that healing takes time, energy and patience and is well worth the effort we put into each step we take. 

Here are one mom's powerful words of wisdom that can teach us the importance of being flexible, understanding and finally, learning to love what our children have come to teach us:

"The Kid has been running hot and cold on piano lessons, which he started in September. I’d like to think I know my kid pretty well, and what I was seeing certainly fit his personality. Because of his fear of failure, every time things didn’t go exactly his way, he’d want to quit. Whether it was getting spoken to for being too silly in group or comparing his skill level to other kids in the class, it didn’t take much to throw The Kid off. He’s become a master at hiding from his Truth.

"This week, The Kid was convinced he wanted to quit (again) … until after the lesson. He bounded into the car, said he wanted to finish the whole year and that he would stay for the movement part next time. Completely unprompted … though I’d like to think it had something to do with the talk we had on the car ride over.

"I told him that I would like to see him stick with it b/c he’s made so much progress and that I can tell he likes it when he chooses to practice on his own and goes around singing the songs … obviously! I told him I wanted to see him stick with something he loves long enough to feel successful without his fear getting in the way.

"But then I also told him about how I quit lots of things in my childhood — organ lessons, cello lessons, ballet lessons, Brownies — and my parents supported me in this, after they made sure I gave it a try. I never regretted any of my decisions, because those weren’t my “things” but that I was glad that Grandmum and Grandpa let me try things so that I could find what I loved (which turned out to be art club in middle school).

"Then finally, I told him that it didn’t matter to me if he quit or not, that I would love him no matter what, whether he chose to succeed, fail, quit — as long as he was confident in his choice. But I didn’t want him to tell me in a few weeks that he wished he stuck with it. My job is to support him in his choices, help him find things he loves and give him all he needs to succeed and go further in those things. But that it is his life and his choices to make. He needed to make the choices best for him, not me, because it is his life.

"The Kid is working on forgiving himself for past decisions he’s made that weren’t based on his Truth, and having the confidence to know the Truth and make decisions based on that. So hearing his voice when he came out of piano that day, strong and sure, warmed my heart (and incidentally made my week-long stomachache go away).

"I know it helped that it was a good practice week and he went in knowing the new song very well. Now that he seems fully committed to piano, its time for me to step up and do my job as primary supporter and make sure that I practice with him daily, so that he’s confident and ready.

"For me, it felt so good to let go of my control. Instead of forcing him to go to piano lessons because I knew his Truth, I was able to guide him to see his Truth and make his choice based on that. What pressure it takes off of me, and what empowerment it gives to him."

When a Child Might Need Willow Flower Essence

Willow is for those who have learned to hold anger in the form of bitterness, resentment and blame.  All of these energies can eventually lead to a victim or “poor me” mentality.  The longer we are taught to blame or hold on to anger, the more we may lean toward feeling bad for ourselves.

These types of angers are stored in the 6th chakra mucus membranes (ears, eyes, nose and the mucus membranes from the nose to the hairline).  Headaches can also come into play with this type of energy especially those centered above the eyes.  Sinus infections, allergies, colds and ear infections can all point one toward the Willow flower.  The throat and bronchial tubes can be affected by Willow energy when mucus drips from the sinus area into the 5th chakra.

The first sign of a sneeze can be a signal that we have entered the state of resentment. So for our very young ones, a few drops of Willow following this initial symptom may ward off the longer effects of these energies.

Children don’t come this way; they learn this way.  Look to your own emotional imbalances and physical symptoms to give you a clue where they may have learned this energy and why it may now be stuck in their system.

Those who do not heal this energy and choose bitterness, resentment and blame will often disassociate themselves from family and friends. They justify their behaviors by blaming others for their own anger. They are strong in their opinions and tend to force their will with a strong desire to be heard. Disassociation is a protection to keep them from feeling hurt by those they love. 

Of course, not feeding the emotion is essential for any real healing to begin and the foods that feed these emotions are cow dairy products, oranges and orange juice, white sugars, refined carbohydrates and yeasty breads.  

The way to healing this energy is always through forgiveness.  “I am sorry ” and “please forgive me” are very powerful words.  Practice using them often in your home so your children are comfortable using them as well.  The more we use healing words in our home, the faster our children will follow our lead so healing can begin.  Forgiveness will lead us to love, and love really does heal all!

When a Child Might Need the Flower Essence Aspen to Help Them Heal

Aspen is a fear flower and fears manifest in the physical body as:  crying, nightmares and sleeping disorders, digestive disorders, circulatory problems and anxiety.  The Aspen energies are attached to unknown, forgotten or buried traumas.

From a very young age, our children are taught how to respond through our reactions. If we react fearfully, we will teach them fear.  Fear may eventually become part of their personality, a means in which they learn to protect themselves from the outside world.  Flower essences can help us reprogram those initial learned patterns of behavior.

Aspen is used often for little children, especially those that awaken with bad dreams and night terrors.  These symptoms are often attached to an old trauma that had been forgotten or buried and has now become awakened by a present emotional situation or experience.  Aspen helps to move this old energy gently through the system.

Rescue Remedy is helpful during the initial moments of releasing trauma; however, I have often felt it lacked the one remedy that helps to bring us back into a tranquil or peaceful balance, and that remedy is Aspen.

Aspen can also be useful during times when young children are plagued with tummy aches.  Digestive upsets can be tied to forgotten fears, and Aspen is helpful when we are unable to put our finger on exactly what the child is afraid of and yet their body is clearly responding in a fearful way.

If we have not healed our behaviors during childhood the Aspen personality may become anxiety driven later in life.  Aspen can help balance that anxiety and bring a state of calm and tranquility to an overstimulated nervous system.

All fear will eventually revert back to the original one - fear of not being loved.  The ability to express loving support during these fearful moments will go a long way in helping our children heal themselves.

Eight Steps to Vibrational Healing With Children

I was blessed to be introduced to vibrational medicines over 30 years ago when my children were coming into this world.  There were eight important steps I took so I could eventually teach my children how to heal themselves:

One:  I educated myself on the products and therapies I was spiritually drawn to.

My mothering instincts guided me to a vast array of books and seminars on alternative healing therapies.  I took advantage of every opportunity presented to me.  I studied herbal medicines, vegetarian, vegan and macrobiotic cooking, homeopathy and flower essence therapies.  I knew it was important to trust the medicines I chose to administer and the food I chose to feed them. The more I studied, the more I trusted. 

Two: I recognized that each of my children was unique and different and each required individual attention to their own healing journeys.

To help my children heal, I had to get to know each of their personality types intimately.  I paid close attention to their body’s signals, physical and emotional, which alerted me when they needed assistance to return to balance.  I also paid close attention to the results, or lack thereof, of the remedies I chose to help them heal.  

Three: I demanded a respectful relationship with any doctor or practitioner I hired.

We did not always agree all the time, however, it was essential that my beliefs were honored. I found doctors and practitioners that allowed us to develop a healthy relationship.  I knew my children best and demanded respect as the main caregiver of their healing needs. It was most important that I was comfortable with any medicine or therapy that was suggested.

Four: I trusted constitutional remedies as an essential part of my children’s healing process.

Because homeopathy was where I felt most comfortable at the time, I searched for a homeopathic doctor who helped me determine each of my children’s constitutional homeopathic remedies.  As my knowledge expanded, flower essences and tissue salt remedies were as equally important to help them heal.  

Five: I created a healing medicine cabinet that fit their individual needs.

Over time, each child had their own unique medicine cabinet that I relied on to help move any energy that became stuck in their bodies.  When they became ill, I taught them to ask, “What am I doing to create this imbalance in myself?”  These are powerful words that allow us to take responsibility for our body’s unique language, which is the first step in vibrational healing.  

Six: I learned to accept that others did not have to agree with me.

At some point I realized it was unhealthy to force my beliefs upon anyone else.  If I wanted to be respected, I had to respectful of other's beliefs.  I learned to let go and let be, yet at the same time, I became confident in my abilities and my knowledge of the healing practices I was choosing to use.  

Seven: I realized that my children came to teach me what I needed to heal in myself. 

I learned early in the healing process that I was programming my children from the moment of conception with every thought I was thinking and every word I was speaking.  I learned to choose my thoughts and words wisely.  I also learned that as I was trying to teach them, they were actually teaching me.  Eventually I came to understand that the behaviors I wanted changed in them, I first had to change in myself. 

Eight: I respected that I was leading my children and I wanted it to be in a healthy direction. 

The years have taught me a great deal about healing. My children, and now my grandchildren, continue to be my most powerful teachers.  When I desire them to be more loving; I become more loving myself.  When I desire them to be more forgiving, I become more forgiving myself. When I desire them to be more compassionate, I become more compassionate myself.  Most importantly, I have learned that in the end, love heals all.